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stay at home mom tips

loneliness
Lifestyle

4 Ways To Beat Loneliness As A Stay At Home Mom

by Jordyn Smith
written by Jordyn Smith

When making the decision to become a stay at home mom, people tell you about the money issues, they give you tips for keeping your kids happy, and they offer tools for helping you keep a busy home in working order. What many don’t mention, is how incredibly lonely it can be. It is a hard thing to admit, we often feel like our loneliness means that we are unsatisfied with our lives, but that isn’t true at all. Even for working moms and dads, taking care of a family is hard work. For mamas who stay at home, it can be especially difficult. Your feelings of loneliness aren’t bad or uncommon, but they can be overcome. The next time you’re feeling overwhelmed and alone, try these tips.

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1. Make Mom Friends

Recently, we have discussed a few great ways to make mom friends, and now would be the perfect time to put those tips to good use. Connecting with other mamas, especially those who also stay at home, is a fantastic way to combat loneliness. With them, you could do all of the things you would do with any other friend. Coffee dates, brunch, buddy-reads, only with the added plus of having someone who understands what it is like to be a mother.

If you find yourself having a hard time making friends, start online first. Become active on your favorite mommy-centered Facebook pages, websites, and message boards. Ask for and give out advice, join discussions, become part of the network of mamas supporting other mamas online.

2. Find A Hobby

Everyone has that one thing that they’re great at outside of being a good mom. If you love art, try making your own pieces. Even if they aren’t masterpieces at first, they will get better over time. If you love writing, start a book, you could try to get it traditionally published or go the self-published route. Since you’re already on the internet, why not start your own blog. Cooking, relationships, mom advice, crafts, whatever you want. Create a hub for yourself to share your ideas with other mamas all around the world. Building and maintaining a website on tob of your other responsibilities will have you so busy that you won’t have the time to feel lonely.

3. Get A Part-Time Job

If your kids are school-aged and going to a traditional school or spending the summer in camps, this time may be especially lonely for you. But it also provides you with a great opportunity try something new. Working because you want to and not because you have to is an amazing feeling. Try getting a part-time job at a local boutique or trying your hand at doing part-time work from home. Getting a job gives you a great way to spend your time interacting with other people, and being ale to line your pockets a bit is great too!

4. Get Outside More

As a stay at home mom myself, I know that there are days when I don’t even bother leaving the house. My son isn’t school-aged and I don’t work outside of the home. If I don’t already have other commitments or a need to run errands, I can become kind of cooped up. That certainly isn’t good for my sanity. Recently, I’ve been making more of a concentrated effort to leave the house more, even when I don’t need to. Even if I’m not really interacting with anyone other than my little one, I find peace in going to a park and being surrounded by other people or window shopping in a busy mall. You can definitely take your kids along for the ride. Just because you’re a stay at home mom doesn’t mean you have to be confined to the inside of your house.

loneliness

Jordyn Smith

Jordyn Smith

A city girl currently living it up in the south with my little family. I love baking, hoarding makeup, and daydreaming. If I'm not writing, I'm probably trying to think up weird pizza recipes or watching Property Brothers.
Jordyn Smith

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How To Transition Your Family To A Single Income
CareerFinancesLifestyle

How To Transition Your Family To A Single Income

by Amanda Foust
written by Amanda Foust

One of the biggest barriers to being a stay-at-home mom is making it on a single income.

All moms have different opinions or desires when it comes to whether or not they choose to stay at home with their kids, work from home, or work outside of the home! No matter the choice, there is no right or wrong. Mothers are doing what’s best for their families. But this particular post is for mamas who may have been working outside of the home but now find they want to stay home.

We gave advice for the big things to consider about transitioning to a single-income in this post, but we wanted to take it a step further by breaking down the big steps into little ones. Even after you’ve done all the planning ahead and budgeting, you may still find yourself in a difficult spot trying to live off one income.

How To Transition Your Family To A Single Income

Here are a few things you can do:

1. Say “No” to wants and “Yes” to needs.

Wanting things is natural. We are impulsive and see a trendy outfit that’s on sale or we find toys that we know our kids would love. Any mom who walks through the doors of Target can attest to how 95% of Target purchases are based on “wants” instead of “needs.” We go in for batteries and come out with a cart full of tea towels, wall decor, stationary, boots, etc. When you want to make it on a single income, wants are no longer as much of an option. Sure, every now and then you can splurge, but it should be rare. Money is meant to cover “needs.”

2. Shop second-hand.

Most anything that’s not a consumable product can be bought second-hand. Nowadays, there are many online places to buy and sell used goods, and of course, there are thrift stores as well. Before you buy, see if you can find something second-hand. I’ve even known friend groups who swap clothes and home decor on a regular basis to change up their wardrobe and environment. Living in a consumerist nation, most second-hand shops are still full of great quality items because most people don’t keep things long enough to really be considered “used.” You’d be surprised at the quality you can find!

3. Switch grocery stores.

Have you ever shopped at Aldi? When an Aldi store came to my town, my family tried it out right away. My husband and I had a cart full of food and were giddy in the checkout line when the cashier told us the total. We had literally cut our grocery bill in half and had purchased so much more than we ever had! Aldi is super affordable. However, there aren’t as many brand options available. I’m totally okay with that as their food is great! But if you’re a brand junky, you may not have the best luck shopping there. But remember, the brand is just a label and you’re goal now is to save money! Buying the Aldi brand may be just what you need to save more money!

If you don’t believe me, read number one in this article! If you don’t have an Aldi in your area, do your research on grocery brands. Certain stores are known to be more expensive than others, no matter the product, so stay clear!

4. Stream your T.V. shows.

Paying a monthly fee for Netflix and Hulu is a lot cheaper than getting cable or dish. You can stream your favorite shows online and even have a special parental control for your children where they can only login to watch kids shows. What’s even better? You don’t have to wait for certain shows to be on to watch them!

5. Wait for the sale.

I am an online shopper. So something that I do is stay logged into my favorite websites and keep the things in my “cart” that I want/need, but I don’t purchase until I have a promo code of 30% off or more! Those type of codes pop up fairly often, so just don’t let yourself be in a rush. Every now and then I lose something that goes out of stock, but it’s never something I needed anyway. It’s worth waiting for the sale! Also, after several days, sometimes my mind changes on a few items, and I realize I didn’t want them anymore — also saving me money!

6. Cut back on unnecessary monthly expenses.

Go through your bank account and write down every monthly payment you make that’s outside of the basic/necessary budget. You’ll be amazed how many subscription services or monthly activities you are involved in that aren’t necessary. Find other ways to have fun together as a family until you can afford the extra activities. And sacrifice the monthly subscriptions because the stress on your finances isn’t worth it.

Tell us in the comments, what are you doing to help you become a one-income family?

Amanda Foust

Amanda Foust

Amanda is a wife, mother, writer/editor, and certified life coach. Pen and paper make her spirit come alive. She spends her creative time reading, decorating, and handwriting fonts. Her world is better with an assortment of chocolate and a stack of books packed and ready for travel. She works each day to be a creative maker and a light bringer. You can find more of her writing at Downs, Ups & Teacups and TheDailyPositive.com.
Amanda Foust

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6 Tips On Making The Transition To A Stay At Home Mom
KidsTips & Ideas

6 Tips On Making The Transition To A Stay At Home Mom

by Jordyn Smith
written by Jordyn Smith

Making the decision to leave behind your regular 9 to 5 job and stay at home with your children is an extremely courageous one. It takes tons of strength and hard work to dedicate so much of yourself to your family, but it can also be extremely difficult to accomplish and get used to.

The transition from working full time, or even part time, outside of the house to beginning working from home or putting work aside altogether, can be quite hard. It can be extremely easy to close yourself off from your friends, forget to take care of yourself, and stress yourself out more than normal. Making sure that you have a balanced schedule that includes some time for yourself and your relationship as well as the space for a little bit of freedom is extremely important.

While they may seem simple, these great tips will do wonders for helping you make a smooth transition into the wild and wonderful world of stay at home mommyhood.

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1. Set A Schedule

While it’s definitely not always possible for the extremely little ones, kids tend to thrive on set, organized day-to-day schedules, and so do stay at home moms. Breakfast, naps, playtimes, school- setting a specific schedule for your weekdays is a great way to keep yourself and your children organized and sane. If your kids are old enough to go to school every day, those 7-8 hours of free time are great for working at home, getting chores done, or schedule some free time with your friends. Of course, there will be times when your schedule completely falls through or gets a little murky, but that’s all part of the job.

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2. Remember To Get Outside

This is especially important if you work from home and/or have children that are too little to truly play outdoors. Even if it’s just a stroll around the neighborhood with your stroller or sitting out on the deck in the backyard, get outside as much as possible. Weather permitting, the fresh air and bustling outdoors will do wonders for your mental health and sense of peace.

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3. Develop A Support System

Having a good support system is important no matter your chosen path in life, but it can be especially crucial as a stay at home mom. Even if you have to rely on online communities, get in contact with other stay at home moms who are in situations similar to yours. Making friends who implicitly understand you and allow you to vent your anger, happiness, and stress when you need to as well as offer you meaningful advice is a huge part of smoothening the transition.

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4. Communicate With Your Partner

It can be hard for your partner to fully understand all of the intricacies and hardships that come with being a SAHM, but as your partner in crime and immediate support system, it is important to keep communication with him alive and well. Talk to him when you’re feeling overwhelmed, stress how important it is still be included in the financial portion of your marriage, and remember to have tons of laughs. Keeping your relationship with your partner stable and happy is a huge part of keeping your transition a successful one.

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5. Do Something For Yourself

Switching from going to work every day to spending most of your days at home can be a bit jarring, especially if you’re used to getting so much time to yourself. It’s extremely important to have something for yourself that makes you independently happy. Whether it’s a hobby, a trip to the spa, or some time to watch your favorite tv show, being able to do something just for yourself on a regular basis will help you reclaim a bit of personhood.

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6. Be Patient With Yourself

Transitions, just like mothers, are rarely perfect. There might be times you when you become frustrated, tired, annoyed, or all of the above. In the beginning, you might miss being able to go to work every day or being able to splurge on things that a one-income household can’t afford, but you have to be patient and confident in the process. Remember the reasons you decided to become a SAHM and always be thankful that you get the opportunity to devote so much of yourself to your family.

Jordyn Smith

Jordyn Smith

A city girl currently living it up in the south with my little family. I love baking, hoarding makeup, and daydreaming. If I'm not writing, I'm probably trying to think up weird pizza recipes or watching Property Brothers.
Jordyn Smith

Latest posts by Jordyn Smith (see all)

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6 Habits Of A Happy Stay At Home Mom
KidsTips & Ideas

6 Habits Of A Happy Stay At Home Mom

by Mary Mulroney
written by Mary Mulroney

Before you had kids I’m sure you dreamt of one day being a stay at home mom. You may have fantasized of waking up whenever you wanted, staying in your PJs all day, relaxing all day long with your little one and doing whatever you wanted because you have no boss (well, except for those things we call kids). I’ll be honest, being a stay at home mom is a wonderful opportunity and gift that some women are lucky to be. However, that doesn’t mean it’s always easy.

In fact, I am surprised at how difficult it can actually be. Taking care of a little one 24/7 with very little breaks can be exhausting. If you don’t make time and effort to still be a normal human being you can get overwhelmed and become very unhappy. If you’re struggling with being stay at home mom, try making these 6 tips habits every day so you will not only be happier taking care of your children, but you’ll be happier for yourself, too.

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1. Schedule Your Day Out

Ok, look, I know that the whole purpose and easiness of being a stay at home mom is that you can do whatever you want whenever you want. I mean, heck, you can stay in your PJs all day long if you really want. The truth is that when you lay around in your PJs and don’t plan to do anything, you’ll end up laying on the couch all day watching TV with your child and get nothing done. Then, at the end of the day you’ll look back and even though you didn’t really do anything you’ll still feel exhausted. Trust me, I’ve tried being a stay at home mom both ways and you feel so much better about yourself when you plan things out, get things done and make effective use of your time.

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2. Wake Up Before The Kids

I know what you’re thinking and yes, I did just tell you to lose even more sleep and get up before your children wake up. I know it seems like you’ll be more tired by doing this, but I bet you’ll be surprised. If you wake up, shower, get ready, have your morning cup of coffee or tea, by the time the kiddos wake up you’ll feel refreshed and ready for your day. You won’t look like a frazzled mess when you drop the kids off at school anymore and instead of having to come home and get ready, you can actually go out and run some errands and get things done.

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3. Make Friends And Spend Time With Them

Moms are special and other moms get it. Look, none of us are perfect and we all go through a lot when taking care of kids, cleaning, cooking, etc. Other moms aren’t going to judge you if you didn’t vacuum your floors this morning or if you didn’t wipe off your baby’s pacifier before putting it back in their mouth. If you don’t have other mom friends, make friends. If you do have mom friends, spend time with them. It’s nice to have friends to talk to and spend time with on those days when we need a little extra pick me up and need someone to talk to who knows exactly what we’re going through.

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4. Play With Your Kids

Sometimes we forget that the real reason we decided to quit our jobs and be a stay at home mom was for the kids! So, since that’s the purpose of being a stay at home mom, actually spend time with them. Play with them, craft with them, cook with them, etc. Make sure to schedule time to spend time with them. Even if you only have time for 30 minutes to play hid and go seek or to do a puzzle, it will do both you and your child good to spend time together. I have noticed that when I’m busy and don’t have time to play with my son I end up getting annoyed with him because he won’t stop bugging me. He’s only bugging me because he wants attention and wants me to play with him. When I do stop and take time to spend with him both he and I are much happier.

5. Give Yourself Some Me Time

With all of your scheduling, make sure to schedule time for yourself. Plan time to do the hobbies you once loved, time for a girl’s night out with all your girlfriends, a massage, or even a manicure and pedicure. It’s important for your sanity to have that time. Every parent needs a few minutes away from the screaming, crying, even laughing and playing children. If you do this regularly you’ll find that you’re happier both with yourself and with being a stay at home mom.

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6. Forgive Yourself

One of the most important things you can do as a parent, is to forgive yourself. No one is perfect, especially when it comes to raising children. We all make mistakes and we all have regrets for things we did or said. The whole parenting thing is hard and you can’t be so hard on yourself. Forgive yourself for your mistakes and move forward. You’ll be much happier and it will allow you to be parent better, as well.

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10 Struggles Only A Stay At Home Mom Understands
KidsToddler

10 Struggles Only A Stay At Home Mom Understands

by Mary Mulroney
written by Mary Mulroney

There is one job in the world that is both the most amazing job in the world as well as the most tiring and frustrating job in the world and that’s being a stay at home mom. It is an amazing opportunity for any mom that is able to stay at home with their children while they are growing up. It’s certainly a very fun job, but it too comes with it’s many struggles. No other person will ever understand these struggles other than fellow stay at home moms. It’s not that we are complaining or sad that we are taking care of our children all day every day, but there are certain times and problems that arise that even the happiest mom struggles with. Here are 10 of these struggles that only a stay at home mom would understand.

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1. You Never Get A Day Off

Being a stay at home mom is incredibly difficult. It is constant work. Even if you’re sick and not feeling well, you can’t take a day off. You still have to feed your children, bathe them, clothe them, entertain them, etc. It’s honestly exhausting and you hardly ever get a moment to yourself, let alone a day to yourself.

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2. You Feel Guilty

Every mom is going to feel guilty. A working mom feels guilty because she’s not spending time with her children. You would think as a stay at home mom that you would never feel any guilt because you’re with your children almost 24/7. However, since you’re not working and making money you feel guilty because you’re not bringing in an income. As a result, you may not be able to buy your child every toy they want or the new clothes that they need. It can be incredibly difficult to feel these feelings, but just remember you’re not alone. Every single mom feels guilty for something, so don’t get so down on yourself.

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3. Nothing Surprises You

When your child smears their poop on their bedroom wall, literally nothing will surprise you. Anything and everything can happen when you have a child, from taking their clothes and diaper off at the playground, to falling off their bike and scraping their knee up, to vomiting all over the car. It’s easy to pick out women who are not stay at home moms because they are shocked and surprised when these things happen. None of these experiences phase a veteran stay at home mom.

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8 Ways To Be A Sane Stay At Home Mom
Tips & Ideas

8 Ways To Be A Sane Stay At Home Mom

by Mary Mulroney
written by Mary Mulroney

Being a stay at home mom is certainly one of the most wonderful opportunities a woman can have. However, that being said it can also be one of the most draining and frustrating opportunities. There is so much to do as a stay at home mom. It doesn’t just involve taking care of your children. You have to clean your home, cook meals, spend quality time with your children, run errands and so much more. Having this large to do list can drive a mom a little crazy. We’ve rounded up 8 ways that will help keep you sane as a stay at home mom.

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1. Do Something Fun Just For You

In order to keep yourself sane as a stay at home mom you NEED to have some time for yourself regularly. Being surrounded by children all the time and constantly taking care of their needs can really drain a mom. Take some time out for yourself so you can recharge whether it’s taking a walk, going to the salon to get a pedicure or even reading a book at the park by yourself. As long as you’re getting out of the house either by yourself or with friends it’ll help clear your head and recharge your body.

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2. Choose Your Battles

Every day we battle our children on many things. Getting your child to put their shoes on can be a battle, or getting them to brush their teeth, or to change their diaper can be a battle. If we battle them on every little thing we will go insane. It’s important to focus on the important things that really matter. Don’t feel the need to fight your child on the little things. If it’s not putting themselves or others in harms way, is it really worth using your energy to fight them over it? For example, If you’re spending time outside with your kids and your toddler starts pouring bubbles out on the floor, is it really that big of a deal? You can always buy more bubbles and they’re not expensive. Just let them have some fun, and let yourself relax.

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3. Get Out Of The House

Being a stay at home mom is an amazing opportunity, however, being in your home with your children can tend to drive you a little crazy here and there. It’s best to get out of the house when you can, even if it means you take a walk in the neighborhood with the kids, or take some chalk out in the front yard for your kids to play with while you enjoy some fresh air. It’ll be good not only for you, but for your kids as well to get out of the house.

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4. Make Enough Food For Leftovers

Cooking food can be incredibly time consuming especially when you’re making breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day. To help cut back on the amount of time you spend in the kitchen, make extra food at each meal so you can have leftovers. That way, instead of cooking dinner 7 times a week you can cook 3 or 4 times a week and have leftovers the rest of the time. You’ll have more time to play with your kids, shower, exercise, or clean. It’ll help give you more free time.

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5. Be Active

We all know the Legally Blonde quote that “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy.” Well, as it turns out, this is true. If you want to keep your sanity and be happier, get some exercise in. You don’t have to workout 7 days a week for an hour, but even going on a bike ride with your kids, taking them on a hike, or running around the playground with them will give you a little extra exercise and make you feel better. Also, when you exercise you’ll be more fit and healthy which will also make you feel better about yourself. No one wants to feel lazy and frumpy, so getting those workouts in will make a world of difference for your sanity.

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6. Be Organized

Kids can be crazy which tends to make life crazy. To make it a little less crazy, try to be as organized as you possible to keep your mind a little sane. Use an organizer and write out your schedule if you need to. Keep your cleaning on a schedule so your home can be as clean as possible as much as possible. Set a routine with your kids so they wake up around the same time every day, have the same bed time every day etc. Doing all those things will help keep you organized and more sane.

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7. Utilize The TV Or Tablets

Now, I know there is a lot of controversy on letting your child watch movies and TV. However, there is something to be said about letting your child watch a little TV so they can be distracted for a few minutes while you shower, clean, or cook dinner. It’s also incredibly nice to have this option when you’re out and about running errands or grabbing a bite to eat. It’s very nice to have a few moments of peace when you’re out at dinner with your husband and if your child is going to watch a cartoon for 30 minutes so you can do that, then so be it. It’s not the end of the world and won’t ruin your child’s brain to watch a little bit of TV here and there so you can have some peace and quiet.

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8. Play With Your Child

Often times I notice when I’m most frustrated or annoyed with my son it’s when I’m not playing with him or engaging with him. Believe it or not, our children do actually want to play with us. Instead of getting annoyed with them bothering us while we are trying to get something done, stop what you’re doing and play with them. You’ll be surprised at how fun it can be to run around with your child, search for bugs, or build a fort with them. It’ll make you feel like a kid again and remind you how to have some fun in your life. Also, it’ll give your child the attention they want and need from you, meaning that they won’t be bothering you every few minutes to come and spend some time with them.

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