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Motherhood

Things I Wish I Had Known Before Becoming a Parent

by LifeAsMama November 18, 2019

When I was younger, I thought that parenthood looks funny as a TV commercial. Everyone’s smiling, eating pancakes and having so much fun. I thought I’d always look great, happy and ready for everything. In reality, parenthood (or more specifically, motherhood) is something that can be so complicated and conflicting at times. There were (are) so many confusing moments, that I often thought to myself: “Is this it? Is this what’s supposed to happen? Am I doing something wrong?” I talked to my mother and to other mothers, including my friends, and it turned out that they all struggled with various aspects of being a parent. Sadly, there are still women who expect motherhood to be sunshine and roses, and for that reason, here is the list of things I wish I had known before I had my baby:

Family with dog sitting by the fire and frying sausages in mountains on the sea shore. Autumn hike in cold weather. Warming and cooking near flame together.

1. Things will be very hard before they become easier

I used to hear all the time about lack of sleep mother has after having babies, but until I’ve experienced it, I had no idea how true this is. Having a baby completely dependent on you, waking up in the middle of the night, right after you’ve managed to fall asleep can be one of the most difficult things. Not because it’s annoying or stupid, but because you have to do it, there is no other way. Then getting used to baby’s needs and other challenges that come with having a small child, can also be too much sometimes. But, the good news is: it’s all manageable and once you get used to it, you’ll become a pro at changing diapers on a whim.

2. Planning for the future matters a lot

When you’re a college student or you work at your first serious job, you feel like the word is yours. Getting a paycheck or a good grade after a hard exam is the biggest success, and you don’t think about much else, besides else. But, having a child means you have to plan for the future as well, since babies and toddlers need constant attention and tend to get sick a lot. Making sure you have the right insurance for your child and the whole family can make you feel more relaxed, as everything’s easier when you know you’re covered in case something happens. Opening a Singlife account can be great for those who want to make sure their future is in safe hands, considering that they offer various types of insurance and money-saving options. Thinking about these things don’t matter a lot when you’re single and childless, but once you have a kid, you have much more on your plant, therefore, getting insured can help you be less stressed and worried.

parents playing with kid outside

3. Learning to be more organized can be life-changing

Being a parent means juggling multiple tasks and chores, every single day. Caring for the baby, making meals, cleaning, shopping for groceries are all things that need to be done on a daily basis, so making to-do lists and learning to shop smartly can certainly improve your life. Asking others to help you out with certain things will surely improve the way you see yourself. Being productive and organized parent isn’t about doing a lot, but rather finishing everything on time.

4. Accepting help doesn’t make me weak

Some people still believe that mothers are all-capable beings who can manage everything without ever taking a break. That’s actually not true since mothers need their me-time in order to feel happy and relaxed. Asking family members and friends for help doesn’t mean a parent is lazy or stupid, so if you ever feel like you need someone to give you hand, don’t hesitate to ask for help, it will seriously make all the difference. Additionally, hiring a babysitter so you can have a drink with your old friends isn’t a bad thing as well, since everyone needs to socialize, including new parents.

Doing everything by yourself will just make you more tired and nervous, and life’s definitely too short to feel that way every day.

family at dinner table

Bottom line

Having a child can such a joyful and life-changing experience, but it’s important to keep in mind that parenthood can often be stressful, unpredictable and hard, but it’s also one of the most rewarding things in life, so, at the end of the day, it’s totally worth everything. Asking for help and being organized can certainly help all parents feel less stressed, and more productive.

About the Author

Mia Taylor is a 33-year old blogger who writes about beauty, fashion and travel. She had always been passionate about fashion and over time she had developed a style of her own. Mia loves to mix and match and get inspire girls with her advice about outfit and accessories. She loves telling a story about her travels, providing beauty tips with readers.

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5 Steps in Planning a Road Trip with the Kids

by LifeAsMama October 28, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

Road trips are part of the fabric of American culture. A great, flexible and affordable way to see the country, many people favor long drives over air travel to get around. Of course, whilst road trips are fun and exciting some of the time, spending long hours and days cooped up in a car on the road can have its challenges. When you add the kids into the equation those challenges can amplify. However, with a little preparation and some ‘off-road’ thinking, you can anticipate and negate the problems commonly faced when you take your family on the road and maximize the fun.

Packing and Preparation

Being well prepared is key for any long journey. Gone are the days where you and your partner could just throw a bag in the trunk, jump in the car and GO. With the kids in tow, a much greater degree of preparation is necessary. As you aren’t limited by airline luggage restrictions, packing doesn’t need to be as restrained as you’re used to. Depending on how long you’re going to be on the road you should aim to pack one appropriately sized bag per passenger. That way you can factor in all gear for all types of weather, and various types of footwear to suit any terrain, meaning you can enjoy all the sites and attractions along your way. Make sure you pack at least one or two in-car bags full of snacks, cleaning wipes, extra layers and emergency supplies (more on these later). Also, give your car a good service before you set out.

Choosing Destinations

The key to a successful road trip with children is planning where you will end up each night. It’s important to remember that with kids you need to allow more time for everything – from packing up the car to visiting tourist attractions and stopping for restroom breaks. When choosing your nightly stopovers it may be a good idea to go for places that include breakfast so you can fuel your troops before you start – this will eliminate the need for an early stop and get you on your way more quickly.

And of course, the big question is where you actually want to go – the Coasts are ever-popular choices, packed full of stunning nature, exciting cities and towns and classic destinations. Whether you’re discovering the gems of the East, like Niagra Falls or taking in the splendors of the Sonoma Valley on the West. Choose what you want to see and do, and leave enough time to see and do it – there is no point in rushing through amazing attractions just because you need to keep on schedule. Getting the kids involved in the planning process is a great way for them to feel more involved, and make the days more goal-oriented – much better than being sat in the back seat feeling aimless for hours at a time.

Fun and Games

And talking of long highway journeys, it’s important to remember that children have a much lower boredom threshold than adults. While you may be content to gaze at the passing scenery and listen to the gentle hum of the engine for hours at a time, the little passengers in the back will be getting increasingly restless. Have a selection of car-friendly games and activities planned out. In the mornings the kids are going to have much more energy, so games with lots of interaction are best (‘I spy with my little eye’, or other classic car games are great). In the afternoons the chances are that everyone (except, hopefully, the driver) will be getting a little drowsy, so more relaxed pursuits such as drawing, reading or watching movies on phones or tablets can work well. If you want to add a bit of road trip education into the mix then getting the kids to read the map or the GPS and give directions (probably best to supervise unless you want to end up lost) is a great way to get them involved.

Emergencies

Back to being prepared. Make sure you have a well-stocked first-aid kit – bandages, plasters, gauze, antiseptic, treatments for poison oak or any of nature’s other miseries are all a must – and travel sickness treatment to alleviate everyone’s suffering. Make sure you take all medications for the whole family and keep them somewhere secure where only the adults can access. Keep track of where you are and make sure you have all the appropriate emergency numbers (the local coastguard if you’re by the sea, or the forest rangers if you’re in the wilderness, for example). As with any adventure – hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.

Snacks and Meals

It’s almost a tradition to hit the junk food when you’re on a road trip. Outlets seem to be placed every few miles along the way, and it’s quick and easy. However, you don’t really want your kids eating fast food constantly, so planning healthy alternatives to munch on for the trip is essential. Choose fruits that aren’t too sticky and messy, such as apples and pears, and make sure you have a selection of nuts to nibble at. Sandwiches will replace burgers and hotdogs easily enough, and are easier on the wallet as well as the waistline.

The key to a successful road trip is, at the end of the day, enjoyment. However, preparation ahead of time, and the ability to quickly address your little troopers’ needs, whether they be appetite, health, boredom related or anything else will mean less on-the-road stress and more road trip fun. For all of you.

About the Author

Bethany Seton is a real estate agent from Melbourne. For the last two years, she decided to leave her office job and follow her passion for writing and traveling. Currently, she travels with her laptop and writes for various blogs, hoping one day she will gather all the experience she gets in one book.

Motherhood

4 Clever Ways to Manage Your Kiddos When You Have Anxiety

by Jennifer Landis October 24, 2019

written by Jennifer Landis

Worrying about everything is part of being a parent. We fret about whether we’re raising our kids right, and if we’re helping them grow into happy, healthy and productive members of society. We hope we’re not screwing them up too badly, and maybe — just maybe — that they’ll turn out smarter and stronger than we did.

It’s part of the job description when you become mom or dad. However, sometimes that worry becomes something more, turning into full-blown anxiety. If being a parent is hard, being a parent with anxiety is nearly impossible. Here are some smart ways to manage your kiddos when you can’t ease your fears.

Realize You’re Not Alone

No one likes to talk about mental health due to the negative stigma around the topic. Plus, popular media likes to showcase people with mental illness as monsters. It’s no surprise people want to hide their diagnoses.

Your first step as a parent with anxiety is to realize that you’re not alone. Anxiety is one of the most common mental illnesses, affecting as many as one out of every five adults in the U.S.

Without support and treatment, this issue can be nearly impossible to deal with. Even if you don’t seek professional help, realizing you’re not alone can change your entire perspective.

Take Care Of Yourself

As a parent, your default behavioral setting is to put your kids first. You cancel your appointments and put off your hobbies in favor of taking them to the dentist or driving them to soccer practice. While this isn’t a bad thing necessarily, as a parent living with anxiety, you need to take time to take care of yourself. If you’re giving everything to others and not keeping anything for yourself, eventually you won’t have anythig left.

Take time for self-care, whatever that phrase means to you. Self-care for parents can be tricky, especially if you’ve got little ones underfoot and are ready to collapse into your bed. Just remember this phrase — self-care isn’t selfish. Taking care of yourself, even if it means a quick five-minute meditation, will make you a better parent in the long run. Plus, it makes it easier for you to manage your anxiety while still being there for your kids.

Talk To Your Kids

It’s tempting to hide your struggle with anxiety or mental illness from your kids. However, the chances are high that, even if you’re not talking about it, they can sense something is off. If you keep it a secret and leave it to their imagination, they may think it’s something to do with them or that they’re the problem.

Talk to your kids about mental health and mental illness. You don’t need to talk about the details of your anxiety or what triggers your panic attacks. Instead, teach them about anxiety and other mental illnesses, which can help them grow into more empathetic individuals.

Mental illnesses are more common than most people think. If we want to get rid of the stigma surrounding them, we need to start teaching the new generation that it isn’t something to hide or be ashamed of.

Plus, by talking to your kids about mental health, you give yourself an out if you have a terrible attack. Instead of trying to hide it, you can say you’re feeling anxious. Ask for a few minutes of silence, or play a game to see who can go the longest without talking. It’s easier to deal with symptoms while teaching your children to be accepting and empathetic of others.

Contrary to popular belief, talking to your kids about mental health isn’t going to mess them up. Instead, it will help make the world a more welcoming place. As children grow up and head out into the world, they will be more understanding of those with mental illnesses and erase the harmful stigma.

Seek Professional Help If Needed

The negative stigma surrounding mental health tends to encourage us to weather things on our own. Some people can manage their symptoms without assistance. However, if you’re not one of those people, you’re not without options.

Plenty of resources are available, from therapy and medication to support groups and more. Each is designed to help you manage anxiety without allowing it to negatively impact your life. If you feel like you’re getting dragged under, reach out for a lifeline and let it support you until you can figure things out.

You’ve Got This

Being a parent is hard. Being a parent with anxiety is even harder — but it’s not impossible. Reach out for help if you need it, and keep the conversation about mental health open with your kids. You’re not alone, even if your anxiety tells you that you are. You have the power to do it.

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How To Get Your Child Ready For The Dentist

by LifeAsMama October 14, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

Children should have their first dental appointment a few months after their first teeth come out. For most children this will be between 6 months and 1 years old. These very early dental appointments will usually just involve a quick check to make sure that the first teeth are coming through without problem, and will be more focussed on instructing parents on how to look after these early teeth.

The most important dental appointments for children occur at around the age of 3 or 4. This is for two reasons. Firstly, children at this age are starting to take responsibility for looking after their own teeth. Getting the right instruction and guidance from a dentist is vital at this point. Secondly, children can start to form meaningful associations, both positive and negative, with going to the dentist at this age.

Early negative experiences with the dentist can cause an avoidant pattern of behavior, as far as dental visits go. Avoiding the dentist in early adulthood is one of the biggest causes of serious dental problems down the line.

Therefore, in order to keep their teeth healthy throughout adulthood it’s absolutely vital that a child has positive early experiences with the dentist. Here are a few ways that you can make sure that this happens.

kid brushing teeth child dentist

Make sure that your child knows what to expect at the dentist

The reason why a lot of people dislike going to the dentist is that it’s such an unusual experience. Laying on your back with your mouth open while someone touches your teeth is not something that happens in any other setting.

Your child is far more likely to have a positive experience at the dentist if they know what it will actually involve. It’s therefore important that you talk to them about what happens at a dental appointment, and why they do what they do. Have your child touch their own teeth to see what it feels like.

Getting used to the sensation of having their teeth felt will make the experience much less unpleasant when it actually comes to visiting the dentist.

Have your child practice having their mouth open

This may sound strange, but the experience of having your mouth open as wide as possible can be strange and unpleasant to a child. It can work muscles that are not used to being used, and can make the mouth feel dry and scratchy.

The best way to get accustomed to having your mouth open for several minutes is through practice. In the few days that lead up to the dental appointment, have your child keep their mouth open for a minute at a time.

This will both get your child used to the feeling of having their mouth open as wide as possible, but will also make the actual dental appointment run much quicker and smoother.

Plan out what questions you want to ask the dentist

Seeing the dentist is a great opportunity for a child to ask any questions about their mouth and teeth that may be worrying them. This could include questions about baby teeth becoming wobbly or any discomfort that they may be feeling when teeth come out.

In the vast majority of cases issues that your child may be worried about will be perfectly normal, and the dentist will be able to put their mind at ease. This reassurance can help build a positive relationship between the child and the dentist which will lead to a proactive approach to managing and preventing oral health problems as they get older

It’s also well worth thinking about what you want to ask the dentist about your child’s teeth before you go to an appointment.

child at the dentist

How to handle suggestions for improvement from the dentist

Perhaps the largest reason why people don’t like going to the dentist is because they associate it with lectures about how they are not looking after their teeth properly. Such criticism can particularly affect a child, leading to feelings of shame around their teeth and promoting a pattern of behaviour where teeth are neglected because of this shame.

Of course, if a dentist is overly critical to a child and their parents, that is poor practice and you should seek out a different dentist.

However, if a dentist sees problems with a child’s teeth, it is their responsibility to suggest ways that these problems can be fixed. Usually these problems will boil down to a “brushing blindspot” namely a part of the mouth (usually at the back) which is being missed during brushing.

You should reassure your child that brushing is a skill that takes practice, and that they should not feel down if their teeth are not perfect. Work with your child to implement any advice from a dentist. When improvement is reported during your child’s next dental visit, praise and reward them for their hard work.

Treat your child after a dental visit

Going to see the dentist is a very healthy and responsible thing to do. It should be rewarded as such. Make sure that you do something fun with your child immediately after the dental appointment.

The more your child associates dental appointment with pleasant experiences (even if they only occur soon after the appointment), the more likely they are to be proactive about seeing the dentist in the future.

About the Author

Ron Baise is a dentist with over 30 years experience. He is currently an Associate Dentist and 92 Dental in London, England.

Baby Health Kids Little Kid Motherhood Pre-Teen Toddler

Childhood Sleep Apnea: What Parents Need to Know

by LifeAsMama October 14, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

According to the American Sleep Apnea Association, 1 to 4% of children in the United States are diagnosed with sleep apnea and most of them are between ages 2 to 8 years.

What is child sleep apnea?

Child sleep apnea is a sleep disorder where a child takes short pauses in breathing while sleeping.

What causes child sleep apnea?

Pediatric sleep apnea is often caused because the muscles in the upper airway relax while the child sleeps. This makes the muscles susceptible and allowsthe tonsils and adenoids to restrict the airflow in the upper respiratory system. This causes sleep apnea in children.

It can be genetic and can also occur in children who have large adenoids and tonsils. If sleep apnea is untreated or undiagnosed, it can pose behavioral as well as physical problems in children.

girl sleeping child sleep apnea

What are the sleep apnea symptoms in children you need to watch out for?

A child with sleep apnea may have the following symptoms:

At night,

Regularly snore loudly
Pause, snort or gasp and may actually stop breathing. Their own snorts or gasps may awaken them from their sleep.
Sleep in abnormal positions or be restless throughout the night
Sweat profusely during sleep
Tooth grinding (bruxism)

During the day,

Difficulty in waking up
Wake up with a headache
Get cranky, irritated or agitated
Fall asleep or daydream
Breathe through the mouth and speak with a nasal voice

If you see these signs in your child, talk to your pediatrician or a pediatric dentist. Consulting a pediatric dentist may seem an unlikely suggestion, but it is the right way to go about it because pediatric dentists are probably the first in line to detect sleep disorders.

If a pediatrician or a pediatric dentist thinks you are showing signs of sleep apnea, a sleep study may be conducted.

How is sleep apnea medically diagnosed?

A test called polysomnogram may be conducted to assess whether a child is suffering from sleep apnea. The test is painless and requires you to stay overnight at the sleep clinic along with your child.

During the sleep study, the following is monitored:

Eye movement and muscle activity
Brain waves
Oxygen levels in the blood
Breathing
Gasping and snoring while sleeping

What are the treatment options?

If your child is diagnosed with sleep apnea, there are a number of treatment options available. The doctor may choose the treatment option that is best suited for your child’s condition.

Surgery: A widely accepted treatment for childhood sleep apnea is the surgical removal of tonsils and adenoids. This procedure is known as adenotonsillectomy.

Continuous Positive Airway Pressure (CPAP): This therapy requires wearing a mask while sleeping. A tube connects the mask to a portable unit, which then applies pressure to open the throat muscles and prevent them from blocking the air passage, thus allowing regular breathing.

Diet and Medication:Some children may suffer from sleep apnea due to obesity. Doctors may recommend diet and weight loss programs to correct the sleep problem.Medication may be prescribed, which may include antibiotics (if surgery was done) or topical intranasal application of corticosteroids and anti-inflammatory medication.

Oral Appliance Therapy: This therapy has emerged as an alternative to surgery and CPAP therapy. This therapy makes use of a dental device that works as a mouthpiece moving the bottom jaw and tongue forward to keep the upper airway open for the child to breathe normally. The oral appliance therapy can be worked out under the supervision of a pediatric dentist.

Bottom Line

Dentists can detect the early signs of sleep apnea. Therefore, you must involve your family dentist in your child’s healthcare program. Get a regular dental check-up done to ensure that your child receives the right treatment at the right time.

About the Author

Shen Chao is part of Dr. Joshua Hong’s Smile Clinic. While working for the Smile Clinic, he’s gained first hand experiences into the questions and concerns that dental patients have. He has been writing to inform people about various dental topics to help his readers improve their oral health. When he’s not working, you can find him on a hiking trail with his dog or having a Sunday cook-out with friends.

Baby Family Kids Little Kid Motherhood Pre-Teen Teenager Toddler

Teach Them Right: The Benefits Of Having Pets For Kids

by LifeAsMama October 11, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

All pet owners know how much our furry little friends make our lives better. A pet near us means we will be healthier, happier, stronger, and more open to people and to life. Namely, a dog, a cat, a bird, a hamster, all of these are companions that give us unconditional love.

We all want the best for our children, we want them to grow up strong and healthy, adventurous and stable, curious and imaginative. We strive towards preserving that childlike wonder and innocence in the modern world, while still teaching them how to actually survive in it, how to not be lead astray by their own wonder and curiosity. The article below notes the benefits pets have for our children, both in terms of their physical and their mental health, their responsibility, and their empathy.

There are tangible, biological benefits to health and stress reduction

There are two very important ways a pet improves your child’s health. First of all, it reduces the stress your child feels throughout the day. Remember, just because your kid doesn’t have your obligations doesn’t mean he or she doesn’t have any stress. School, preschool, it can all be difficult for your child. With a pet, they get some comfort. Petting an animal lowers cortisol levels, the stress hormone.

The second way pets help is through lowering said stress hormone. Cortisol messes with our immune systems, it puts a strain on them, making us more susceptible to diseases and just getting sick. Furthermore, being exposed to a dog’s or cat’s germs form a young age means you are building up their immune system from an early age. You are essentially toughening them up through exposure.

Finally, they will just get a lot more exercise since they are going to walk them regularly, as well as playing and roughhousing. Anything that pries them, and you, away from a computer or smartphone screen.

boy with pet dog puppy

Responsibility and confidence

Many parents get their children a pet as a way to teach them how to be more responsible, surer of themselves. Namely, getting a pet means they have very strong, important motivation to actually learn how to be responsible. You can bury them in chores, bribe them, threaten them with curfews and lower their pocket money, but you can get much better, more organic results with a pet.

Namely, a pet is a living, breathing thing they love and care about. There is no better way to motivate them to learn how to be responsible then to care about their favorite member of their family.

On a practical level, this means they will get up at the same time every day (or most days) to walk the dog, or to feed the cat. They will clean up after their pets, taking care of bird cages, litter boxes, and hamster wheels. You can even send them to the pets store if they’re old enough.

On your part, you need to teach them properly, instead of them getting the animal, or themselves, into trouble. Talk to your veterinarian, and give very clear instructions when it comes to diet. Read articles from good websites, like, Totally Goldens, or maybe pick up a magazine recommended by your vet. Your child will most likely want to feed your pets as much as possible, just because they see that they like it. You have to explain to them why this doesn’t work. Or, they may not understand why walking your dog is so important, or why you can’t feed xyz to your pet.

Help children develop empathy

A pet gives unconditional love – they do not judge, they don’t care who you are, where you come from, who your parents are – a pet will love you and your child unconditionally. They give comfort, support, they listen intently… You, your kids, your family are the number one thing in their lives. They are the best, most loyal friends anyone can hope for.

This showing of unconditional love can teach your children how to be loving back, they help them build empathy. Furthermore, caring for a dog or a cat or whatever pet you have teaches them to be empathic, to put the needs of someone, or something, else in front of their own needs.

They also get the opportunity to practice their verbal skills even when they are not in the company of other people. Young children will get to talk a lot more, they will communicate to their pets, explain things to them, in general, keep their minds occupied.

Conclusion

A pet can do wonders for your children’s development. It teaches them what unconditional love is, what it looks like. You can also help your kids develop empathy, as well as work towards improving their verbal skills and communicative skills. They will become more confident and responsible by taking care of the pets, and they will also be healthier due to lower stress and regular exposure to their furry best friends.

About the Author

Kimberly Anderson is a simple girl that has a weak spot for dogs, cappuccino and sleep. She’s also a writer and everlasting enthusiast who believes that there is nothing better starting your day with a hot cup of coffee.

Baby and mother sleeping together in bed

Baby Health Motherhood

The Link Between Depression in Mothers and Their Baby’s Sleep

by LifeAsMama October 11, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

It’s common for newborn babies to not sleep through the night, as do their parents. However, research shows that the first six months of life are extremely important in the development of sleeping patterns (circadian rhythms) for the future. New studies show that babies whose mothers suffered from depression before they were pregnant or during their pregnancy are much more likely to having erratic sleep patterns in their first six months than other babies. We’ll explore in this article exactly what this link means for newborns.

mom happy holding baby sleep

The Background to the Study

This latest study comes from years of studying the link between sleep and depression and circadian rhythms, and finding that they were closely interlinked. At first, the research focused on adults and teenagers, before they moved on to looking at the link in newborns. This research is based on studies of sleep between two groups of newborn babies and their mothers. One group is comprised of mothers who suffered from depression during their pregnancy, and the other group is made up of women who have never suffered from depression in the past or present.

The Study Details

The women in both groups wore small devices on their wrists called actigraphs which evaluated how much sleep they got at night, how much light exposure, and their daytime routine including activity and naps. They started wearing them during the last trimester until their babies were eight months old. Two weeks after the birth of their babies, each child also received a small actigraph to wear for eight months.

Impact on Circadian Rhythm

The study showed quite conclusively that babies who were born to depressed mothers had nearly zero or zero evidence of an innate 24-hour circadian rhythm after birth, whereas the babies born to mothers without depression had this. This continued throughout the length of the study. As Nancy Kruger, a psychology writer at Australian help and Oxessays explains, “if sleep is constantly disrupted and there are no clear circadian rhythms, these individuals grow up to be much more likely to also develop depression. This is why it’s so important for all babies and new mothers to get the best sleep possible.”

Napping Patterns

One key connection found that babies born to moms who were depressed tend to nap more during the day, take more time to get to sleep at night, and also wake up much more often throughout their sleep. This is like insomnia in adults but starts much earlier. This creates more sleepless nights in parents but also means that those children may be more likely to suffer from depression later on in their lives. Researchers did reassure families that babies born to depressed mothers will not necessarily follow in their footsteps even if depression runs in families, while also warning non-depressed parents that they should still closely monitor their baby’s sleep.

The First Months

It’s very important for babies to be trained in the fist few months to sleep when it’s dark and be awake when it’s light out, so that their circadian rhythm can develop properly. Young babies that are two months or younger need 11 to 18 hours of sleep, so napping is also recommended, and for the next ten months 11 to 15 hours of sleep is required. Then, infants between the ages of 1 and 3 need 12 to 14 hours. That’s why it’s important to establish rituals around bedtime to help children understand the difference between nighttime sleeping and daytime sleeping, such as night clothes and day clothes.

Building a Schedule

It’s also important to build a sleep schedule around bright lights during the day to get your body’s circadian rhythm to associated light cycles with sleeping. Make sure you’re not shining the light in their eyes and they’re protected from direct sunlight. By four months old, the sleep schedule should be much more regular and centered on nighttime sleep with fewer breaks. In fact, Georgie Prince, a health blogger at Academized and Paper Fellows, adds that “during this time, it’s also important for the new mother to sleep on a regular schedule as well. The post-natal period is a high-risk time for depression in new mothers, even if they have no prior background of depression, and lack of sleep is a contributing factor.”

By making sure you’re monitoring your baby’s sleep patterns and building a natural schedule for sleep from the earliest age, you’re giving your child the best possible chances to have normal sleep patterns later in life and prevent depression.

About the Author

Ellie Coverdale, a health writer at Ukwritings and Essayroo, shares her insights on psychology and health in families. She is interested in the links between families and physical and mental health. You can also find her work at Boomessays. In her free time, she practices yoga and meditation.

Motherhood

Tips for Working Moms: Raising Brilliant Kids

by LifeAsMama October 10, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

Balancing between work and child-rearing can be tricky and often very exhausting. After all, you need your job to be able to tend to your kids’ needs, but you also want to raise your kids to be the best version of themselves. At times, this may appear like an impossible thing to do. Sometimes you’re simply tired, or you feel like there aren’t enough hours in a day to do everything you’re supposed to. When it all seems to become too much for you to handle, take a step back, take a few deep breaths and go through these helpful tips for all those hard-working moms who want their kids to let their brilliance show.

Make your outings count

Working and raising children means that you’ll have multiple demands you’ll have to meet, often simultaneously. That’s why you have to have do some serious planning and prioritizing. For example, if you have to stay late at the office due to some important project, make sure you talk to your employer and see if that means that you can leave work earlier after the project is done and things settle down a bit. Also, you should set your priorities straight. If you can skip a meeting without any consequences, do it, especially if you have to choose between the meeting at work and one at school, with one of your kids’ teachers. And once you clear your schedule for some quality time with your little ones, make it count. Take them places where you know they’ll have fun, but they can learn something, too. For instance, visiting a local farm is a healthy activity, since they’ll spend their time in the fresh air, being physically active and enjoying themselves, but they can still learn a lot about animals and how different food is produced. They can see where milk and wool come from and whether their favorite fruit and vegetables grow on trees, vines or are shrub-grown. Similarly, you can take them to an aquarium and introduce them to the underwater world. This way your kids will get to learn through experience and come to some of their own conclusions about the world around them.

Be picky with your daycare options

If you’re at work, you’ll definitely need somebody to take care of your kids during working hours. This may mean that you’ll have to drive them somewhere before work and pick them up afterwards, or that you’ll have a babysitter with them at home. Whichever option you choose, make sure it’s one that promotes good habits, develops your children’s love for learning, that it will enable for their curiosity to be cherished and all questions answered properly. This doesn’t mean that their daycare should have them taking school-like lessons. On the contrary, spending their days exploring nature and engaging in unstructured play can provide them with more benefits than guided learning. And in case you decide to hire a babysitter, find one who has experience with younger children and who won’t mind participating in renowned early childhood education programs with your little ones. These kinds of programs can boost your kids’ problem-solving skills, help them with speed reading, as well as upgrade some other competences you’d like to see in your children. The very process of choosing the right daycare option for your kids may cause you some headaches, but it’s something you should be extra careful with. You don’t want to lose focus at work worrying about the safety and wellbeing of your children, and if you choose well, you’ll know their emotional, social and all other types of intelligence are being fostered even when you’re not with them.

Inspire them to read

Whenever the opportunity arises for you to delegate some of your commitments and tasks to your co-workers, take it and use the time to be there for your kids. Although you may want to spend those precious days off work outdoors with them, you should still find some time to instill the appreciation for books and reading in your little ones. A good idea would be to introduce reading stories to your evening routine. After all, that’s the time when you’re all at home. Plus, reading is a good activity to calm your kids down before they go to bed. If they’re still little and can’t read, read to them, so that they perceive reading as something pleasant from the earliest of age. On the other hand, if they can read, make it your together time and find an appropriate book for each of you, so that you can read together. Of course, this doesn’t have to happen only in the evenings. Use every stormy day to read, or spend the sunny spring and summer days reading in your backyard. This way you can enhance your kids’ verbal skills, enrich their vocabulary and teach them to process information from what they read. Plus, if you talk about what they’ve read and what their opinions on different books are, you can help develop critical thinking in them. You can even have them do a roleplay to present the book’s contents to you, which can encourage them to show creativity and imagination

how to raise a brilliant kid

As difficult as being a devoted mother and having a full-time job is, it can be done. One last piece of advice would be to show yourself the understanding and kindness you do to your kids. This means that it’s perfectly fine to ask your parents, siblings or babysitter to take care of your kids while you have a few hours to yourself. Think of it as an investment in your kids, since a happy mother means happy children.

Author’s bio

Isabel William is consultant by day and a blogger by night and Mom to twins 24/7. Area of interest includes education, well being, mental health, as well as self-improvement. Considered by her peers a lifetime educator, whose passion is love for writing and helping people, parenting, education and science.

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Newborn Babies and Marriage: How To Keep Your Relationship Alive During Those First Few Months

by LifeAsMama October 9, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

Having a child is, undeniably, one of life’s greatest joys, but when you have a newborn your priorities will instantly change. Learning to parent alongside your partner takes up a large bulk of your time as a couple, alongside the usual household chores, early mornings and day to day jobs, many couples often find that they spend less and less time as they once were, which can be hard to adjust to.

Adjusting to these new demands as parents and finding time to nurture your marriage or relationship is important for your mental and emotional wellbeing – you’ll likely find that you need one another’s support now more than ever! There are some simple things you can do which will keep your relationship thriving during those first few months of adjustment and keep you both, and your new bundle, happy.

Make A Date

Before your baby was born, you probably thought your schedule was busy enough. Now, it probably feels overwhelming, what with working, cleaning, feeding and caring for your new baby. Inevitably, your time together spent as a couple is likely to have been sacrificed. By arranging a date where you will both spend time together means that you will likely make this into a habit and this comes with great benefits for you, your partner and baby.

Your dates might start as a coffee or glass of wine in the kitchen after you’ve put the baby to bed, talking about your day, but when you feel ready to leave your newborn for a few hours, this could turn into a movie or dinner date. If you don’t quite feel ready to leave your baby yet – and this is fine – then why not take turns cooking for one another during the week? Spending time together and alone should be a priority and made into a regular occurrence, no matter what you decide to do.

date night married couple newborn baby

Show Your Affection and Appreciation

Think back to when you first began dating. You likely called your partner just to say “hello” or ask how their day was and this doesn’t need to stop just because you’ve had a baby! Whether you leave a note for them in their pocket before they head out for work, make them a cup of coffee in the mornings or just buy them their favourite treat after a long day – it doesn’t need to be a huge romantic gesture, just something which shows them that you’re thinking of them, it could even be taking their diamond jewellery engagement ring or your wedding rings to get polished!

roses gift newborn baby marriage

Make Time To Switch From Mom and Dad to Wife and Husband

Just because you have a newborn doesn’t mean that you’re now known as Mom and Dad. It is important to be firm with your parenting routines so that you get time to make that transition after a long or tiring day. Once you’ve put your baby to bed (hopefully for the night!), it’s time to switch back to you. Whether you decide to take a nice long shower with your favourite products, have an uninterrupted hot drink or just sit and watch your favourite tv show together for 20 minutes, whatever you need to do to make this transition, make time for it. Being parents is a 24/7 job which never ends, but you and your partner will feel better and find it a little easier if you are both happy and find time for yourselves. It’s important to remember that you are both on the same team – there are no winners or losers!

husband and wife happy marriage

About the Author

Natalie Wilson is a freelance wellness and lifestyle writer. She loves researching and writing about new wellness trends and topics, as well as keeping up to date with the latest news. When not writing, you can find her taking long walks in the countryside with her dog or browsing her nearest bookstore. You can connect with her on Twitter @NatWilson976.

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Best Backyard Add-ons for Your Kids

by LifeAsMama October 4, 2019

written by LifeAsMama

For a family with kids, younger or older, no backyard can truly feel like part of home unless it is adjusted to children’s needs and interests. If you want your child to fall in love with the outdoors and the endless variety of activities it offers, start by transforming your yard into a children’s fantasy world. Though the options are many, we can elaborate on a few favorites that certainly won’t let you down.

1 – Outdoor chalkboards and easels

Have you noticed that your child enjoys the magic that a paintbrush or a simple colored pencil can create? Don’t hesitate to get a couple of chalkboards for your yard so your son or daughter can continue to nurture their talent. Outdoor chalkboards (or canvas on an easel) are a highly convenient solution for parents who wish to keep their children entertained while also avoiding having a big mess inside the house. If you want to do something even more interesting, you can turn part of the fencing into a big chalkboard wall.

2 – Yard sandbox

If you think back to your own childhood, you are more than likely to reminisce of your own little sand haven you loved to play in. Not only do sandboxes help develop an outdoorsy spirit in kids, but they also have multiple other benefits. Set one in your own backyard and your children will get a chance to further learn and improve their social, motor, and practical skills, grow genuine curiosity and eagerness to explore their environment through direct physical contact, and also stimulate and enrich their own imagination. These add-ons are physically beneficial as well, as they help kids strengthen different groups of muscles, especially those in the arms and hands.

3 – Child-friendly swimming pool

Okay, this one probably should be the first item here—undoubtedly, almost every child wants to have a pool at home. Funwise and healthwise, it goes without saying that swimming pools are an absolutely fantastic add-on for a backyard. They are an endless source of entertainment, not only for children, but for adults, too.

It needs to be emphasized, though, that they do require a higher level of supervision and caution on behalf of parents, so children should not be left alone during their fun time in the water. Preferably, for extra safety, you could also add a fence around the swimming pool to prevent children from accidentally falling in if they do spend part of their time in the backyard unsupervised. Whenever we are talking safety measures, the best thing is to consult specialists and professionals. Exterior are a really wise choice if you want the perfect combination of adventure and safety in your children’s swimming pool.

4 – Swings

Swings sound like a great option for backyards with limited space and if you prefer to keep your child engaged in a single activity for a longer period of time. Even in a smaller area where there isn’t much room for running or playing sports, a nice swing can give your child a sense of freedom, movement, and spaciousness thanks to its dynamic nature. Even on a cold and rainy day, your little one will probably ask to go and play on the swing rather than stay indoors.

5 – Hammocks and silly spinners

If you have bigger trees in your backyard, you could also consider getting a sturdy hammock and/or a silly spinner. They are both excellent alternatives for standard swings, not to mention that they are just as much fun. If you are in a creative mood, you also have the option of making a silly spinner yourself instead of buying one. What is more, you can ask your child to contribute to the process of making the spinner, for example to paint it. This will only make your son or daughter enjoy it even more since they will know they helped bring this creation into existence.

6 – Slides

Slides are also a truly convenient add-on, being that both younger and older children find them a lot of fun. They also come in different shapes, sizes, and are made from different materials, so it is easy to find a slide which will be suitable to your child’s age and physical characteristics.

7 – Climbing tires

If you have some old tires lying about in the garage, here’s a great way to recycle them. Turn these eyesores into an attraction by transforming them into climbing tires. What makes them such an excellent addition to your backyard is that little kids in particular seem to find them irresistible when learning to walk and establish balance, while also strengthening their muscles at the same time. Climbing tires are budget-friendly and even more fun when painted in bright colors kids will easily fall in love with!

In conclusion…

For any parent who wants to inspire in their child an affinity and respect towards the great outdoors, smartly chosen backyard add-ons are the right call. Allow your little one to explore and grasp the world through a thought-provoking, inspiring, exciting corner of their own home where they will feel safe and taken care of.

About the Author

Ron Wolf is a freelance writer, hobby designer and DIY enthusiast.

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