You’ve made it through the sleepless newborn nights, the first taste of food and the first bout with a tummy bug. You should have smooth sailing from here on out, right?
Not so, unfortunately. Life with a toddler — think the terrible twos or life with a “threenager” (instead of a teenager) — is full of its own joyful milestones and challenging obstacles. Still, a little preparation and a dose of reality can go a long way in preparing for toddler-dom.
1. They Express Likes and Dislikes
If you’ve been wondering what your baby is thinking, you’ll soon find out. As your children enter toddlerhood, learn to recognize and validate their preferences while also teaching them about boundaries.
You might need to say, “Amy, I know that you like playing baseball, but we are going to have dinner now. You can play again after dinner.” You could also help by giving them other options: “I know you want to have ice cream for dinner, but that’s not healthy. Would you like chicken or meatballs instead?”
2. They Point To What They Want
You’ll be able to communicate in more complex ways with your children as they grow, and pointing is an early communication tool. Often a child around one year old will point to what she wants, such as the fridge when she’s hungry or a toy when she’s bored. Be sure to interact with the baby by pointing and explaining throughout your day together.
3. They Climb Stairs. A Lot.
The word “toddler” comes from the verb “to toddle”, so it should be no surprise that there are milestones related to walking at this age. One of these is the ability to climb up the stairs, which could spell trouble for those of you with a two-story house! In the beginning you will need to supervise their every step, but eventually they will be pros at climbing the stairs and your tired arms will rejoice.
4. They Brush Teeth “By Themselves”
Early dental care is important for preventing cavities, so start young with the introduction of a toothbrush. In the beginning, you will help show your child how to brush, but always give them a bit of time to “brush” on their own as well. Before you know it, your toddler will learn how to brush their teeth on their own.
5. They Discover “Stranger Danger”
It’s perfectly normal for your toddler, who used to wave “hello” to everyone in the grocery store, to resist being with anyone who isn’t mom and dad, including family and friends. Oh, and to be quite verbal (i.e. scream, yell and cry about it). Give your child time to warm up to the adult and move slowly. Instead of handing your child over to friends and running upstairs to get some laundry done, sit and play with everyone in the room to let your child know they are safe. Prepare your relatives so that no feelings are hurt.
6. Temper Tantrums
We’ve all seen flameouts in the cereal aisle at the grocery store. Toddlers simply don’t have the maturity to process feelings of frustration and anger, so they tantrum. There are ways to avoid temper tantrums, like planning ahead so Bobby isn’t due for a nap when you are in a crowded market. And remember to take a deep breath: This is a phase. If you have a child who is autistic, there are plenty of resources for you as well, including a guide on managing autism tantrums and meltdowns from Autism Parenting Magazine.
7. They Can Scribble
A budding Van Gogh or Kahlo? Between one and three years, your baby will learn to hold a crayon and start to scribble, then to draw more deliberately. Purchase thick crayons meant for unsteady toddler fingers to help Junior learn to love coloring and sit with your child to show how to concentrate and complete the task at hand. Add stickers or paint for a bit more fun!
8. They Drink From a Cup
Bye bye, bottles. And bottle brushes. And bottle warmers. Hallelujah! As your toddler’s mouth and coordination skills progress, they will be ready to transition to sippy cups. Before you purchase a cupboard’s worth of cups, think about what style would work best for your little one and test a few out.
9. They Link Words Together
The language skills of toddlers vary greatly, so don’t get discouraged if you still can’t understand most of what your little angel is saying. However, if your child is barely talking, you may want to look into speech therapy for toddlers. Watch for progress and engage your child in conversations even if you can’t grasp most of what she’s saying.
10. They Become Mommy’s Helper
You’ve dreamed of the day your child might be able to help with the loads of laundry he creates. Sorry, today is not that day. But as toddlers grow, they want to shadow mommy and daddy and help. Create little tasks that will help introduce chores and allow them to help. You can even sing while you work: “Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere, clean up, clean up, everybody do your share!”
For some families, having a toddler is the height of frustration. Parents often feel defeated and exhausted. But by knowing what to expect and how to work through the quintessential challenges and milestones of this age, you’ll be better prepared for the terrible twos, “threenagers,” and beyond.
Jennifer Landis is a 27-year-old healthy living blogger who loves yoga, running, and dancing it out with her toddler! You can find more from Jennifer at her blog, Mindfulness Mama, or by following her on Twitter: @jenniferelandis.