It’s no secret that having a baby completely changes your life. It’s amazing how such a small human can turn your whole world upside down. Your life will never be the same again and with that comes so many emotions, a lot of confusion, but also a lot of excitement. There are a lot of things as a first time mom that you won’t know and understand, but hopefully these 7 pieces of advice will help make your first year as a mom a little easier.
1. You’re Not Alone
One of the biggest things you need to know is that you are not alone in this journey called motherhood. Every single mom that has ever lived is going through or has gone through what you are experiencing. The best part about that is that means you can talk to other moms about what you are experiencing. Don’t be ashamed by what you’re feeling or thinking. The more you talk to other moms and realize that they, too, struggle and have the same hardships as you will make you feel more sane.
2. Most Everything Is Just A Phase
It’s incredibly important to understand that what your baby is going through is just a phase. So, even though your child has to be held every moment of every day isn’t going to last forever – in fact it’s just a phase. The fact that your baby wakes up every hour in the middle of the night is again, just a phase. Babies grow and change so much that one minute they’ll waking up and crying all night long and the next they’ll be sleeping for hours on end. Even though it seems like what you are going through is going to last a life time, it really won’t. Your baby will change, learn, and adapt to their new life in this world.
3. Don’t Compare Your Child To Others
Every child is different. As a parent you need to accept that. Do not compare what your baby is doing to other babies. Just because your best friends child is sleeping through the night does not mean that your baby should be sleeping through the night. Just like adults have different personalities and preferences, so do babies. So accept the fact that your child is different than others and that just because your child isn’t doing something that other kids is doing doesn’t mean that your child is not growing or developing properly.
4. Everything’s Going To Be Okay
At the end of the day all you need to know and focus on is that everything is going to be okay. I know it seems like it’s the end of the world at the time, but it’s certainly not. Tomorrow is a new day and another opportunity to try again for both you and your baby. Look at how many children and how many moms there are in this world. They all survived through it and so can you.
5. It’s Okay To Take A Moment For Yourself
As a mom there are many moments where you will feel like you can not continue doing this anymore. Whether you can’t hear your child cry for one more second or you can’t lose one more minute of sleep. In times like these, it is more than okay to take a moment for yourself. The first six months of my son’s life was incredibly difficult. His naps were outrageously short and he woke up constantly through the night. I was running on such a small amount of sleep that I honestly could barely function. All I wanted to do was cry and sleep. During those moments, please know that it is okay to take a moment for yourself. If your child won’t stop crying, put them in a safe place like their crib, close the door, put some headphones on, listen to some music, and take a deep breath. It’s safer for your child to cry for a minute or two in a safe place than to be in an exhausted and emotional parents arms. At first you may feel guilty or like you’re a bad mom for doing this, but in reality you are a good mom for removing your child from a potentially harmful situation.
6. Don’t Burden Yourself With Other’s Advice
Honestly one of the most important things to know as a parent is to take other people’s advice with a grain of salt. You will receive endless amounts of advice from friends, family, neighbors, strangers, and everyone else under the sun. People love sharing their advice, but you have to remember that YOU are your child’s parent. YOU know your child the best. You have a physical, emotional, and spiritual connection with your child and you know what’s best for them. Just trust in your feelings as your child’s mom and it will all work out.
7. Savor Every Moment
Like I said before, babies change so incredibly fast. One moment they are cuddling and sleeping on your chest and the next they are running around getting into everything. Even though it’s hard to focus on the good when you’re having a hard time with your baby, try to savor every moment you have with your little one. I know it is frustrating that your baby won’t let you put him or her down because you can’t get the dishes done, but in a couple months or years you won’t get cuddles anymore from you child. Try to appreciate the time you have with them as much as possible even if it means you can’t clean the house or shower.