Being a mom is one of the most difficult jobs in the world. Not only do you have to do so much as a mom, but you expect so much of yourself, as well, because that’s what others expect of you. There is an “expectation” placed on what a good mom should and shouldn’t do and often times, it’s just plain ridiculous. That expectation causes a lot of hurt, guilt, depression, and sadness on moms. We already feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of “things” we must do every day, and to have others put us down because we aren’t doing something the way they think it should be done, is not what we need. As moms, and women in general, we need to be more accepting and loving towards each other. Everyone is different, everyone does things differently, and that is okay. It’s time we realize that, yes, in fact, we are good moms, despite our short comings. If you’re struggling with feeling like you’re not as good of a mom as you should be, read this list of ways to know you’re a good mom, and I guarantee you’ll feel better about yourself.
1. You Have Bad Days, And Know That It’s OK
Look, every mom has her bad days. There are days when our children won’t take naps, when they have an accident in the car, when they throw a temper tantrum in the middle of the grocery store, etc. Those days just happen, and it seems like when it rains, it pours. Just because you have these bad days does not mean that you are a bad mom or that you aren’t doing something right. It just means that you are taking care of little human beings that have minds of their own and will sometimes do their own thing and have accidents, despite what they have been taught is right or wrong. It just happens and that’s okay. You’re still a good mom.
2. You Have Good Days, And You Celebrate Them
Of course, just like there are bad days, there are really incredible good days! Luckily, for our sanity, the good days outweigh the bad days most of the time. Good moms, of course, have good days with their kids. Days when everyone is smiling, days when everyone eats their dinner, days when your kiddos go to bed on time. Those days are awesome and it obviously means you’re doing something right, so enjoy them and know that you’re a good mom.
3. You Know You’re More Than Just A Mom
Good moms know that they are more than just a mom. They are caregivers, doctors, babysitters, chefs, housekeepers, wives, and most importantly a woman and human being. Moms do so much more than just have children and take care of them. They are amazing people with incredible talents and attributes. To say that you are “just a mom” is a horrible, degrading thing to say. You are SUPERMOM. Having this knowledge makes you an even better mom because you appreciate yourself so much more. When you love yourself, it allows other people to love you even more.
4. You Understand You Don’t Have To Do It All
Most women probably think that in order to be a “good mom” you have to do it all, like take the kids to school, go to work, take the kids to practice, make dinner, help with homework, clean, help out the neighbors, etc. That couldn’t be farther from the truth. A good mom does what she can. She gets the things done that are the most important and if the other things fall behind, then it’s okay. If the bathroom has to wait to be cleaned a few days, it’s okay. If you’re sick and need help from friends and family to take care of your kiddos while you’re down for the count, it’s okay. No one, not even a Supermom can do it all.
5. You Worry, A Lot
You know you’re a good mom when there is constant worry on your mind about your child and their wellbeing. You’re worried that they might be getting sick, you’re worried that they are getting proper nutrition, you worry that they aren’t being bullied at school, you worry that they’re safe at their friend’s house. If you’re worried about your child(ren) you obviously love them with all your heart, and if you ask me, that makes you a pretty good mom.
6. You Know You’re Not Perfect
For some reason it seems like in order to be a good mom we have to do everything absolutely perfect. The cooking has to be perfect, the gifts have to be wrapped in a spectacular way, the house has to be continually cleaned and picked up. I’m sorry, but that is just not realistic. No one is perfect and no one can do everything without making mistakes along the road of life. Sometimes bad things happen and you forget to change your child’s diaper for a few hours, or you yell at your child out of frustration, or you spank your child because you don’t know how else to handle them at that moment. It’s okay that you make mistakes. Every person, especially moms, make mistakes.
7. You Understand Your Kids Aren’t Perfect Either
Good moms know that their children are not perfect. That means they have a little more patience when their child spills their milk on accident, or they don’t yell at them for making a mess with their toys. Kids are humans, too, which means they’ll make just as many, if not more, mistakes than you. Good moms realize this, and as a result aren’t always so hard on their children.
8. You Have Your Priorities Straight
If, instead of going out with the girls, you stay in with your kids and have a movie night, you’re a good mom. If you don’t shower before you leave in the morning to take your kids to school because you had to braid your daughter’s hair, you’re a good mom. If you put your family, and especially your kids first, before yourself, that is the ultimate sign of a good mom. Really great moms understand that there is more to life than themselves. They understand that life is about the happiness you find in your children and your family and they enjoy spending time with those that they love. That’s not to say that putting yourself amongst your priorities is bad, because everyone needs a night out with friends and a peaceful shower to themselves once in awhile!