Tag:

moms

Holiday

A Busy Mama’s Guide to Managing Holiday Stress

by LifeAsMama
written by LifeAsMama

There are a lot of expectations around the holidays. As a mother, you’ll probably feel the pressure to cook the perfect meal, buy the best gifts, and attend every social gathering, while still managing your regular day-to-day responsibilities.

Balancing these tasks can quickly become overwhelming, especially if you don’t take care of yourself. However, with realistic expectations, mindful planning, and a little self care, you can keep holiday stress at bay. Here are five simple ways even the busiest mamas can navigate the holiday season:

Balance Social Obligations

The holidays are a great time to gather with family and friends. However, committing to too many social gatherings can become more of a stressor than something you enjoy. Consider which holiday gatherings you’d like to host and attend versus the ones you’d rather skip.

Be sure to prioritize important family traditions, and don’t be afraid to say no when you don’t feel up to going somewhere. If you have to turn down an invitation, consider sending a thoughtful thank you card, or offer to meet up at a later date. The holidays are a busy time for everyone, so chances are they’ll understand.

Treat Your Body Well

During the busy season, it’s easy to push your own needs to the side. However, prioritizing your health and scheduling time to focus on yourself will help you keep up on your mental and physical needs amid all the holiday chaos. Be sure to carve out time in your schedule to take care of yourself and practice self care.

Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, exercising regularly, and eating healthily. In addition, consider blocking off a day to treat yourself to a stress-relieving spa treatment. Or, if you’d rather stay in, buy some new skincare products to indulge in at home. When you look and feel your best, you’ll feel more confident and energized to push through the holiday season.

Make a Plan

It’s never too early to start planning for the holidays. Ahead of the busy season, take some time to list out all of your responsibilities. Then, create a schedule for yourself, and set flexible deadlines to keep yourself on track. Break up activities, such as gift buying and home decorating, over a few weeks so you’re not scrambling to get everything done at once.

The holidays can get expensive, so it’s also good to prepare a budget ahead of time. Project the amount you anticipate spending on gifts, food, decor, and travel, and try your best to stick to your budget so you’re not overwhelmed when the bill arrives.

Get Your Kids Involved

Striking a balance between your family, career, and personal responsibilities is a task for a super mom. When you’re running around trying to get everything done, you may feel a strong sense of mom guilt. However, your responsibilities don’t necessarily have to take you away from your kids.

Consider involving your children in holiday activities, such as gift wrapping, decorating, cooking, and cleaning. This will give you peace of mind in knowing you’re spending quality time with your kids while also accomplishing tasks around the house.

Ask for Help

You may not feel comfortable admitting you need help, but doing so will help take some of the weight off of your shoulders. All moms need a break at some point, and your social network of support will help reassure you of that.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed or stressed, consider delegating some responsibilities to your partner or a close family member or friend. Free up some time for yourself to relax and decompress, and remember that you can always return the favor when things have settled down. Asking for help not only allows you to enjoy the holiday season but also makes others feel good, too.

Give Yourself A Break

You don’t need to throw the perfect family gathering, buy the best gifts, or attend every holiday party to have a joyful holiday season. Remember, you can’t be two places at once, and you can’t expect to do it all on your own.

Don’t beat yourself up if things don’t go as planned. Instead, acknowledge what went well and cherish the memories you’ve made. Things will likely settle down come January 2nd, so go easy on yourself, and don’t sweat the small stuff.

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Baby and mother sleeping together in bed
BabyHealthMotherhood

The Link Between Depression in Mothers and Their Baby’s Sleep

by LifeAsMama
written by LifeAsMama

It’s common for newborn babies to not sleep through the night, as do their parents. However, research shows that the first six months of life are extremely important in the development of sleeping patterns (circadian rhythms) for the future. New studies show that babies whose mothers suffered from depression before they were pregnant or during their pregnancy are much more likely to having erratic sleep patterns in their first six months than other babies. We’ll explore in this article exactly what this link means for newborns.

mom happy holding baby sleep

The Background to the Study

This latest study comes from years of studying the link between sleep and depression and circadian rhythms, and finding that they were closely interlinked. At first, the research focused on adults and teenagers, before they moved on to looking at the link in newborns. This research is based on studies of sleep between two groups of newborn babies and their mothers. One group is comprised of mothers who suffered from depression during their pregnancy, and the other group is made up of women who have never suffered from depression in the past or present.

The Study Details

The women in both groups wore small devices on their wrists called actigraphs which evaluated how much sleep they got at night, how much light exposure, and their daytime routine including activity and naps. They started wearing them during the last trimester until their babies were eight months old. Two weeks after the birth of their babies, each child also received a small actigraph to wear for eight months.

Impact on Circadian Rhythm

The study showed quite conclusively that babies who were born to depressed mothers had nearly zero or zero evidence of an innate 24-hour circadian rhythm after birth, whereas the babies born to mothers without depression had this. This continued throughout the length of the study. As Nancy Kruger, a psychology writer at Australian help and Oxessays explains, “if sleep is constantly disrupted and there are no clear circadian rhythms, these individuals grow up to be much more likely to also develop depression. This is why it’s so important for all babies and new mothers to get the best sleep possible.”

Napping Patterns

One key connection found that babies born to moms who were depressed tend to nap more during the day, take more time to get to sleep at night, and also wake up much more often throughout their sleep. This is like insomnia in adults but starts much earlier. This creates more sleepless nights in parents but also means that those children may be more likely to suffer from depression later on in their lives. Researchers did reassure families that babies born to depressed mothers will not necessarily follow in their footsteps even if depression runs in families, while also warning non-depressed parents that they should still closely monitor their baby’s sleep.

Mom and baby sleep depression

The First Months

It’s very important for babies to be trained in the fist few months to sleep when it’s dark and be awake when it’s light out, so that their circadian rhythm can develop properly. Young babies that are two months or younger need 11 to 18 hours of sleep, so napping is also recommended, and for the next ten months 11 to 15 hours of sleep is required. Then, infants between the ages of 1 and 3 need 12 to 14 hours. That’s why it’s important to establish rituals around bedtime to help children understand the difference between nighttime sleeping and daytime sleeping, such as night clothes and day clothes.

Building a Schedule

It’s also important to build a sleep schedule around bright lights during the day to get your body’s circadian rhythm to associated light cycles with sleeping. Make sure you’re not shining the light in their eyes and they’re protected from direct sunlight. By four months old, the sleep schedule should be much more regular and centered on nighttime sleep with fewer breaks. In fact, Georgie Prince, a health blogger at Academized and Paper Fellows, adds that “during this time, it’s also important for the new mother to sleep on a regular schedule as well. The post-natal period is a high-risk time for depression in new mothers, even if they have no prior background of depression, and lack of sleep is a contributing factor.”

By making sure you’re monitoring your baby’s sleep patterns and building a natural schedule for sleep from the earliest age, you’re giving your child the best possible chances to have normal sleep patterns later in life and prevent depression.

About the Author

Ellie Coverdale, a health writer at Ukwritings and Essayroo, shares her insights on psychology and health in families. She is interested in the links between families and physical and mental health. You can also find her work at Boomessays. In her free time, she practices yoga and meditation.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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mother's love
Inspirational

My Child, You Will Never Be This Loved Again

by Amanda Foust
written by Amanda Foust

“You will never be this loved again. So on those days when you are feeling stressed out, touched out, and depleted, just remember that you will never be this loved again. One day you will long for their affection. So choose a soft voice, choose gentle hands, choose love.” –AK

mother's love

I’m not sure who “AK” is, but I really love the quote above. My daughter is almost five and my son is two-years-old, and most days I feel like we are in survival mode or I’m internally counting down until bedtime. I love them both dearly — so, so much!!! But this age has no boundaries. The needs, demands, and touching are endless. But there are so many sweet moments that I lock away because I know this stage won’t last forever. Nights when my son rubs my cheeks and looks into my eyes with a sparkle as I sing him to sleep. Days when my daughter curls up on my lap and asks me to scratch her back while she twists my hair around her long fingers.

Like a photograph, I take a mental picture so I remember them for a lifetime. Because in those moments I want to capture the love I feel — their insistent cuddling, the repetition of “Mommy, mommy!” and the way they dive into my arms after only a few hours apart (because to them it seems like forever)! I want to remember their laughter during their favorite show, the faces they make when they try a new food, and the excitement they feel after taking a risk!

I love them more and more every day, and I know that the hard parts of parenting them will never go away — it will simply change!

A recent article on HuffPost reminded me that though raising young kids can be all-consuming and exhausting, there are still difficulties as they grow older. Author Lisa Leshaw said: “I am struggling to separate and allow you to test your wings. I am afraid I already know that you can fly. I am scared to death that you will fly far away, and never want to nest again. I guess I want you to stay on the ground for a little while longer.”

One day our kids will be ready to fly away, and all we will have left are our mental snapshots. So on those days when you don’t want to hear your name called again and all you seem to be doing is cleaning up messes or correcting difficult behaviors, remember you will miss this! Choose love and gentleness so you can look back fondly on these days.

Tell us in the comments what moments YOU want to remember as your kids grow?

 

 

mother's love

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grace
Faith

To The Mom Who Needs To Give Herself Grace

by Amanda Foust
written by Amanda Foust

To the mom who needs to give herself grace,

Your kids don’t want a perfect mom; they want you! So why do you spend so long trying to do it all?

One day, I was laying next to my son as I was putting him to bed. Flying through my head were scenes of the day when I had messed up — no fruits or veggies served, dirty feet were under the blankets because time flew by and we skipped baths, and I had lost my temper a handful of times in the past 24-hours. But as we closed our eyes to pray and my son told God about his day, he thanked God for all the fun he had and for his mommy.

I was surprised! How could we see the day so differently?

I’m betting you and your children don’t see things the same way either. While you are trying to find your superhero cape and juggling everyone’s expectations (including the ones of yourself), your kids are taking in the moments of love and acceptance and filtering out all the parenting mishaps. They truly give us so much grace and see the best version of us!

Watch the video below. It’s my go-to when I need a reminder of a child’s perspective.

You aren’t always going to keep your kids happy, prepare healthy meals, find the perfect balance of screen-time and play, or keep your temper under control 100% of the time. But at the end of the day, remember that you have given your kids love — and that’s all they want! Throw out your version of the mom you’ll never be, and embrace the wonderful mother you are!

As Lysa Terkeurst reminds us: “Motherhood is a million little moments that God weaves together with grace, redemption, laughter, tears, and most of all love.”

grace

Amanda Foust

Amanda Foust

Amanda is a wife, mother, writer/editor, and certified life coach. Pen and paper make her spirit come alive. She spends her creative time reading, decorating, and handwriting fonts. Her world is better with an assortment of chocolate and a stack of books packed and ready for travel. She works each day to be a creative maker and a light bringer. You can find more of her writing at Downs, Ups & Teacups and TheDailyPositive.com.
Amanda Foust

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competitive moms
Inspirational

Why I Stopped Competing In Motherhood

by Amanda Foust
written by Amanda Foust

I’ve always been a competitive person. I’ll never forget my nephew looking at me with tears in his eyes after I beat him in a video game and he said, “You were supposed to let me win!” Oops.

But although I’m a competitor at heart, one thing I was not prepared for was the competitive nature of motherhood. When I was an outsider, I imagined a support system so strong, encouraging, and although somewhat dysfunctional, I knew motherhood was a club I wanted to join.

competitive moms

I am not saying every aspect of motherhood is competitive, but competition does creep in.

No matter what phase of motherhood you are in, how tired you are, or how your child behaves, someone always has it worse than you. You mention feeling worn out, and the other moms spout off their longer to-do list. I’ve seen mothers look so defeated while others talk about their own personal stress. Whatever phase of motherhood you are in, another mama will claim hers is harder. Competitive moms are no joke!

Venting is a necessity, in my opinion. I am with two young kids all day and need my adult time. However, I find myself beginning my stories with, “I know others have it worse but…” or “I know it will only get harder, but I feel…”

Let me just say, that’s draining! Why do we play each other’s enemy without first offering one another the compassion and support we all want? Why do we believe our friends have the worst in mind for us rather than the best? Why do we lose friends over the silliest things that go along with motherhood instead of seeking to understand and holding tight to the ones who want to walk through the crazy journey alongside us?

This isn’t even getting into those friends we have who do not have kids — as if women with kids are the only ones who understand what it’s like to be tired. I don’t know about you, but I am all for keeping busy. Before my daughter, I was still working multiple jobs and receiving little sleep. I know friends of mine who don’t have kids who I can honestly say they work just as hard. I could never devalue them by saying, “You don’t understand,” or “Wait until you have kids!” They know. They feel what we feel and need support too.

Are you tired? Yes. More than me? Maybe! But does comparison unify or separate us? Spend less time comparing your life to those around you and more time celebrating all of your motherhood wins.

I find myself falling into the trap of competition all the time, but let’s support, encourage, and enjoy the beauty found in all stages of life together!

 

competitive moms

Amanda Foust

Amanda Foust

Amanda is a wife, mother, writer/editor, and certified life coach. Pen and paper make her spirit come alive. She spends her creative time reading, decorating, and handwriting fonts. Her world is better with an assortment of chocolate and a stack of books packed and ready for travel. She works each day to be a creative maker and a light bringer. You can find more of her writing at Downs, Ups & Teacups and TheDailyPositive.com.
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work-from-home moms
Inspirational

The 8 Best Tips For Work-From-Home Moms

by Amanda Foust
written by Amanda Foust

Work-from-home moms have a different reality than most. And though we are grateful we can be home with our kids and contribute financially, we are currently a small percentage. There isn’t very much advice out there to help us succeed at both motherhood and work.

work-from-home moms

Life As Mama is all about women who straddle the line of stay-at-home moms and working moms because they don’t get enough credit. There’s no “wrong” direction between staying at home or working. We just want work-from-home moms to know they matter too and to be open to some of our best tips!

1. Work your hardest at the beginning of the week so you can ease off at the end.

Mondays are hard, but work-from-home moms are way better off when they start their week off right by getting organized on Sunday night and working hard come Monday morning. Think about it this way: the more productive you are at the beginning of the week, the more relaxed you can feel at the end! Don’t let the procrastinator take over and leave you stressed at the end of the week! You will then find yourself feeling frustrated and impatient with your children because of your own lack of early preparation and hard work.

2. Maintain a planner.

What I have found that works for me is to plan my work week and projects on Trello. Trello is an online forum to organize projects and systems for both you and a team. I don’t know how I lived without it for so long!

For my personal life, I use a hardcover planner. It helps to keep my work and home life separate as so many other lines are blurred when it comes to these parts of my life. If I were to open up my planning tools and see all my work and home responsibilities in one place, I would quickly become overwhelmed. But maybe that works best for some! Find what works best for YOU and be consistent.

3. Make time for your marriage.

Unfortunately, I have found that my marriage is the first thing in my life to get neglected since I began working from home. It’s not because I don’t care, it’s only because my kids need me in ways that are more obvious and pressing. My husband patiently waits on the sidelines, and that is not where he is meant to be. I am working on making my marriage more of a priority. Putting the phone down, unplugging from work, and laying the kids down to sleep early are just a few ways to make room for your marriage. Another idea is to keep one night a week “safe” from any plans! This will be your date night! Sometimes you will be able to get away, but even if you just have an in-home date night, make it fun and intentional!

4. Turn off electronics.

This isn’t just for your marriage; this is for YOU as well. You need to cut yourself off from work just like others do when they walk out of the office. There will always be more to do, emails to answer, and projects to plan, so pick a time during the day and stop your work by turning off the electronics whenever you can.

5. Organize

Organization comes naturally to me in some ways and very unnaturally to me in others. For example, my house is organized and clean, but when it comes to planning a routine, I struggle. Since I began working from home, I’ve found that the more I can organize, the better. When the kids have a routine, they thrive! I am the same way! Organize your days by having one day of the week scheduled for appointments, another for errands, and several for staying at home. Try your best not to intermix the days. The less you can jump from one thing to another, the better! Our brains were made to focus and not spend our days constantly multitasking.

6. Meal plan

Cooking is a struggle for me — especially since I began working from home. I think it’s because I am in charge of breakfast, lunch, dinner, and all the snacks in between for all of us, and by the time dinner rolls around, I’m tired of all the food prep! Some things that help my family are crockpot meals and freezer meals! My husband helps a lot in this area too. If you have older children, get them involved! And if cooking is something you enjoy, schedule time during your week for meal planning and prep!

7. Do a few chores EVERY DAY!

I often become envious of working moms for the fact that they can leave their homes clean in the mornings and come back to them clean after working all day! For me, I get behind very quickly if I don’t do laundry one day or get too focused on work while the kids tear up the other rooms in the house. I MUST maintain my home by doing daily chores so that the weekend isn’t always a time for catching up!

8. If all else fails…hire help!

It’s not bad to admit that you need help! For example, the summer months my daughter isn’t in preschool, so nap time for my son (that usually lands the same time as preschool) isn’t available for work. Therefore, one day a week I had to hire a sitter so that I don’t get behind. Maybe it’s a housecleaner you need or someone to mow your lawn. Whatever help you can afford and take off your plate, do it! And don’t feel guilty!

Work-from-home mamas, give us YOUR best tips in the comments!

work-from-home moms

Amanda Foust

Amanda Foust

Amanda is a wife, mother, writer/editor, and certified life coach. Pen and paper make her spirit come alive. She spends her creative time reading, decorating, and handwriting fonts. Her world is better with an assortment of chocolate and a stack of books packed and ready for travel. She works each day to be a creative maker and a light bringer. You can find more of her writing at Downs, Ups & Teacups and TheDailyPositive.com.
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happy
FunnyKids

20 Things That Make Moms Happy

by Ellice Vargas
written by Ellice Vargas

As moms, we work everyday to make our kiddos happy and to give them a wonderful childhood. We act selflessly and give until it hurts. Then we give some more. We rock, bounce and sing even though our bodies are exhausted.We sit in the blistering heat and freezing cold watching soccer, baseball and every other kind of sport cheering until our voice are hoarse. It’s all worth it, and we would do it all over again. Because seeing our kids grow and thrive is incredible. But there is also many things that make us happy. Let us know if any of these sound familiar.

happy

1. Fresh Brewed Coffee

Hello, caffeine. Nothing beats a steaming hot cup of Joe.

2. Baby Smiles

Those first sleepy newborn smiles, and giant gummy grins. They are the greatest. All of them.

3. Hugs

Nothing centers me more than a sweet hug from my kiddo.

4. Being Appreciated

A few kind words, a pat on the back, a nice card. Moms love to be appreciated and told we’re doing a good job.

5. Seeing Our Children Thrive

The proud factor is off the charts. That’s my kid reciting the alphabet at 18 months.

6. Five Minutes of Peace

Even if it’s hiding in the closet to get it.

7. Wine O’Clock

Or beer, or Gin & Tonics, we don’t judge on your drink of choice.

8. Peeing Alone

Privacy. Never would I thought that getting to do my business alone would bring me so much joy.

9. Newborn Baby Sleeping On Your Chest

That sweet fleeting stage goes too too fast. Bottle up those precious moments, mamas!

10. Chocolate

A slice of heaven. Basic survival necessity.

11. Mom’s Night Out

Because Moms need a break every once in a while too.

12. Experiencing Our Kids “Firsts”

Tiny smiles, first steps, saying mama. Watching them experience things for the first time. Gah, those are the moments we live for.

13. Bubble Baths

Hello me-time. Splurge on those fancy bath bombs and salt scrubs. It’s your own mini spa.

14. Buying Kids Clothes

Because so tiny and so cute! Does’t matter that we look like a walking dead extra, just take all our money. My kid is basically a walking commercial for Old Navy. But we rock those sales of course.

15. Sleep

Ok, for the love of all that is good. Let us sleeeeeeeeep.

16. Eating Our Meals With Two Hands

I think the most exciting thing about eating at a restaurant kid free, is being able to eat an entire meal with BOTH your hands. Bliss.

17. Nap Time

Now this doesn’t mean we don’t love you. We just need you to take a nap ok so we can take a breath. Deal?

18. Hearing “I Love You” From Our Kids

Especially when it it’s unprompted. Heart melt.

19. Having A Village

Having those people in our lives to encourage, support and be there for us and our families no matter what.

20. Watching Our Kids Grow

It’s so bittersweet. But watching our babies grow up is the most glorious and wonderful gift.

 

make moms happy

Ellice Vargas

Ellice Vargas

I'm a British gal and mama to one sweet daughter. I love a good DIY project, interior design and photography. When I'm not writing for Life As Mama, I'm traveling as much as I can with my little family and filling up my camera roll with snapshots of our life.
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park
Inspirational

I’m That Mom At The Park On Her Phone

by Leena Kollar
written by Leena Kollar

I’m that mom at the park. The one who’s on her phone as her children repetitively hop up and down the playground steps, sliding down the tunnel slides between each lap. The mom you look at with judgment because you think I’m being neglectful. But there’s more to the story than me simply “ignoring” my children.

park

You see, I’m actually a bit of a paranoid mama when it comes to my littles playing at the park. My oldest child is four, but I still make sure to stand close by as he climbs that rock wall. And my littlest one is just two, so she can’t master those tall ladders on her own yet. Even though I’m sure she’d be ok climbing up the shorter ones, I still stand next to her, my hand lingering behind her back, as she does. Because it’s my natural instinct to want to keep my children safe.

So why are you allowing yourself to be distracted by your phone, you ask? Well, let me explain.

Well, let me explain. I’m a “stay-at-home and work” mom, which means I work from home part-time and stay at home full-time. The days my kids are in school, I work as a freelance writer. The days they aren’t in school, I work as a mom (which we all know covers a wide variety of titles ranging from chef to chauffeur to butt wiper). This setup has many benefits, as well as many downfalls. While I get to have a flexible schedule doing something I really love, I also have to make up for lost time by staying up late and squeezing work in on the weekends. Work that includes responding to emails. Researching writing topics. You know, things we often do on our phones.

Yeah, but can’t you do that when your children are napping so you can pay attention while they play at the park?

Actually, no. I can’t. My oldest stopped taking naps eons ago, and while my youngest naps, I try to get more work done, whether it’s around the house or for Life As Mama. And truthfully, I’m guilty of being on my phone when I’m home with the kids too. But if I wasn’t checking emails and browsing Pinterest for awesome DIY projects, I wouldn’t be contributing to the well-being of my family. Because when I’m finding personal fulfillment through my work, it makes me a better mom. It makes me a happier mom. It shows my children that doing something you love reaps great rewards.

Kids

I also believe it’s important for my children to learn to play independently. To spend time exploring on their own, without having to rely on me all the time. Even though I’m on my phone at the park, I still watch them from the corner of my eye. I look up every few seconds to make sure they are safe (us mamas are masters at multi-tasking, right?). I speak to them while I respond to emails and sometimes I’ll snap a photo of them for my Instagram page. No, I’m not “fully” engaged, but sometimes an hour at the park is the only break I get from my busy home life. Sometimes, checking out of my helicopter mommy habits to scroll my Facebook feed is the only adult interaction I get that day. Sometimes, the only time I get out of the house is to drive down to the park, and it’s the only chance I have to be free of little people pulling and tugging on me every.second. Sometimes, being at the park is the only opportunity I have to catch up on the local and national news. My phone is the main vessel to my sanity and the outside world sometimes.

But here’s what else you don’t see. Those emails I’m answering? They are going towards a paycheck that I earn so my children have clothes to wear to the park. That research I’m conducting? It earns me money to buy wipes so I can wipe their dirty hands and faces when we head home from the park. And that whole thing about me ignoring them? Even if that was the case, it’s only for about an hour- the equivalent of what a work outside the home mom gets for an actual lunch break (which I don’t get). But you don’t see me as the mother I am most of the time. You don’t see when I’m giving them a bath and teaching them how to wash their hair. You don’t see when I sit down with them to read a bedtime story, usually at least twice, before I tuck them in, say prayers with them and tell them that I love them. You don’t see me rush to their side and wipe away their tears when they’ve fallen off the coffee table. And you don’t see when I drop them off at school and give them a big hug before I tell them again that I love them and hope they have a good day.

Maybe I’m a bit distracted when I’m at the park. But that doesn’t make me a bad mother. The fact that I usually neglect myself should be a good indication that I put my children first. And I’m learning how important it is to maintain my own identity. The one that often gets lost among dirty dishes, poopy diapers and temper tantrums. The one that I can sometimes only find by pulling out my phone and escaping reality for a bit. I’m that mom at the park. The one who’s on her phone. The one who’s doing the best she can at this motherhood thing.

 

park

Leena Kollar

Leena Kollar

Contributing Writer at Life As Mama
I'm a wife, mother and everything else associated with domestic life. I can often be found hiding from my kids to sneak treats (especially ice cream). I love rainbows and naps, and I find any excuse to go to Target. When I actually make it out of the house in real clothes, I document my outfits on my fashion blog, Leather & Lip Gloss. My love for fashion also inspired me to start my own comprehensive style website, The Style Spectrum.
Leena Kollar
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second baby
Baby

7 Ways Bringing Home Your Second Baby Is Different

by Ellice Vargas
written by Ellice Vargas

As I anticipated the birth of my second baby, I couldn’t help but wonder how things would be different this time around. I already knew I was hoping for a baby who liked to sleep, (don’t we all), and was confident that I would not be a hormonal hot mess the second time around because I knew what to expect, right? Well here are 7 ways bringing home your baby is different the second time.

second baby

 

1. Breastfeeding Is Still Hard

I was reallllllly hoping that breastfeeding would be a breeze with second time around after a very challenging (and painful) time with my first baby. Turns out, it can still be hard work even if your baby comes out with a perfect latch. Sore nipples, engorgement, mastitis, any of these things can happen and are considered “normal”. The good thing is usually this will all pass after the first couple of weeks as your nipples toughen up and your milk regulates.

2. You Are More Likely To Leave The House Sooner

Did you hibernate in your home barely leaving at all for at least a month with your first baby? Well, that might not be the case this time around. It might be school drop offs, kids classes or just getting your crazy toddler out of the house for an hour, but you are more likely to feel pressured to be “back in the game” much sooner. It might seem intimidating leaving the house with more then one child, but remember, you’ve done this newborn gig before and you can do it!

3. You Are Experienced, But Each Baby Is Different

While you have all the experience from your first baby under your belt, you may find yourself re-learning a lot of things or possibly doing it a whole lot differently this time around. As we know, no two babies are the same.

4. Sleep When The Baby Sleeps Isn’t Always Possible

Are you wishing you took that advice the first time around when it was just you and the baby? If you have another kiddo at home sleeping when the baby sleeps isn’t going to be possible, unless you get both kiddos napping at the same time (which is ah-ma-zing). Since sleeping isn’t always an option, make sure to give yourself a break and leave the dishes or laundry. Make yourself a nice cup of tea and sit for a while, or spend some quality one on one time with your toddler, and don’t you dare feel bad about those chores not getting done.

5. The Lack Of Sleep Is Easier To Manage

Now, don’t get me wrong, you will still be exhausted. Maybe even more so with two kiddos to care for all day. But I definitely found the first few weeks easier to manage then with my first because I was prepared and had done it before. In fact my toddler sometimes still wakes up a night and is an incredibly early riser. My body has been conditioned to sleepless nights and that somehow made the sleep deprivation easier to manage the second time around.

6. Endless TV, But Not For You

When my first was born I watched the entire series of Gilmore Girls, because being home alone holding a fussy baby it was the only thing that kept me sane. This time around it’s not me watching endless amounts of TV, but my toddler who needs to be entertained while I care for the baby. At first I felt guilty about it, we’ve all read about what too much screen times does to kids, but I soon shook off that guilt and remembered that this is just a season and there is plenty of time to detox the screen time later on.

7. Treasure Each Moment

This time around you know how dang fast that newborn stage goes and you might find yourself sobbing into your pillow when they hit that one month milestone, or when they grow out of their newborn size diapers. The other side of this is that you know there is light at the end of the tunnel if you haven’t slept more then 2 hours in a row and haven’t showered in at least 3 days. Soak up those newborn moments because babies don’t keep.

Ellice Vargas

Ellice Vargas

I'm a British gal and mama to one sweet daughter. I love a good DIY project, interior design and photography. When I'm not writing for Life As Mama, I'm traveling as much as I can with my little family and filling up my camera roll with snapshots of our life.
Ellice Vargas

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Inspirational

Moms: Stop Comparing And Embrace Your Unique Strengths

by Amanda Foust
written by Amanda Foust

There are many different types of moms. We tend to fall into a “category” yet we are surrounded by all the types! This is where comparison wrecks havoc. Looking around, we see the mom experts, PTA moms, crunchy mamas, the helicopter moms, the worried moms, and the boasting moms.

Instead of understanding our type and taking pride in who we are, we wish our strengths away and hone in on our weaknesses.

“I never volunteer enough at the school.”

“She is always bragging about her kids. I should do that more!”

“That mom worries about everything. Maybe I am not protective enough of my children!”

“Her kids love eating healthy, and I can’t even get mine to eat one little carrot!”

Maybe thoughts similar to the ones above have plagued you. But it’s important to know that if we were able to be every type of mom, it would make us some kind of superhero. We can’t have all the right answers, be the room mom at school, protect our kids from every danger, keep away all chemicals, limit our foods to only organic, and never forget to praise our children in front of the world for their accomplishments all at the same time.

But good news!

We were created to be the exact mother our children needed. Our strengths provide for the unique needs of our children. 

Are you a worrying or helicopter mom? God knew your children under your wing wouldn’t worry enough and would need the extra protection.

Are you a PTA mom? You are making memories with your children and helping their education along the way!

Are you a mom expert? Your knowledge will be invaluable to other moms looking for answers to their endless questions.

I could go on, but you get the idea! There is a place for your strengths in your children’s lives as well as among the other moms. Don’t let your type discourage you or let comparison weaken you.

Women can be judgmental and stuck in their ways, but that’s why it’s important for us to be secure in who we are and what we bring to the table as mothers. So let’s own our type and watch ourselves flourish! We give ourselves room to thrive when we stop burying ourselves with expectations we will never meet.

Tell us in the comments: What type of mom are you and why do you believe it’s the perfect type for your children?

Amanda Foust

Amanda Foust

Amanda is a wife, mother, writer/editor, and certified life coach. Pen and paper make her spirit come alive. She spends her creative time reading, decorating, and handwriting fonts. Her world is better with an assortment of chocolate and a stack of books packed and ready for travel. She works each day to be a creative maker and a light bringer. You can find more of her writing at Downs, Ups & Teacups and TheDailyPositive.com.
Amanda Foust

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